Big Winner, as if...

I talk to myself. I’m not ashamed of it either. I do it mostly when I’m in the car by myself. I think through worries out-loud, or have conversations with people that aren’t there, usually discussing something that’s just happened, or working out some plan out-loud. Sometimes they are people that don’t even exist – made up people. Oh my.

I bought a Powerball ticket this morning, and when I got into the car I began to practice how my interview with Jennifer Rooks will go when the world learns that my family and I are millionaires.

So tell me, the moment you found out that you’d won, were you in complete shock?

“Honestly? No, I wasn’t. See, it’s funny…I was just talking about this with my uncle the other day...when I buy a lottery ticket? I just KNOW I’m going to win. I don’t buy it thinking that I’m wasting a dollar; I don’t walk away thinking that my chances are slim. I always think, ‘this is the ticket’. I’m just certain…filled with a complete certainty that I’m going to win (you know, like Charlie and the Chocolate Factory? Charlie and his grandfather just know they’re going to win, even though they don’t).”

Oh. I see. So, exactly how did you feel?

“Well, when I saw the little article in the paper explaining that the winning ticket had been purchased at the Landing Store? and hadn’t been claimed? I just knew it was mine. I sat down at the computer to make sure. I looked at the numbers on the screen, and slowly matched them with the numbers on my ticket. And when I realized that they all matched? I just said, ‘Yesss.’ I said it just like that, ‘Yesss.’”

Because you’d just won 30 million dollars!

“Well, no, it was more like ‘Yesss, now I can pick up my drycleaning, and have my car fixed, and get my daughter braces, and maybe send my son to private school...and buy some new underwear.”

Ohhh. And when did you, or did you at all, ever just explode from excitement?

“Oh yeah, I did! About 5 seconds after that I got REALLY excited! Breathless and jumping up and down and my heart started to pound way too fast! And I was trembling all over! ... and I think my lips went cold...”

Your lips went cold. (Ahem) And what did you do then?

“I called my husband. I thought he wouldn’t believe me.”

And did he?

“He did actually. He was quiet for a few seconds? But I think my voice told him that I wasn’t joking. And then he threw up. It was just REALLY exciting. Overwhelming, actually.”

Okaaay. (Ahem) So now that you have won I have to ask, what will you do with all that money?

“Well, my husband wants to travel, and get a bigger house? We’ll do that of course. And the kids want a pool? oh, and they want to go to Italy. So, we’ll do that too.”

And what about you? What do you want to do with it?

“Oh, ME? I’m going to hire someone to do the laundry!”